Swamp Gas, what is it?

"The methane produced by methanogens living in the waters of SWAMPS, SEWAGE, or MARSHES is called SWAMP GAS." - according to the internet site on Biology.

Now what are methanogens? I don't even know how to produce...I mean pronounce that word. What is methane? Does it emanate from methanogens?


What started this talk about swamp gas?


A new form of energy, trapped swamp gas.

Hey did you ever wonder why new carpet gas could not be used as fuel? It is really stinky, and probably combustible. I like new carpet, it has a nice feel, and I like the carpet gas smell. It's probably like sniffing glue. Now there's a term that really dates me. Kids are so sophisticated now, that they probably think I'm talking about dope (another dated term). Nope, just inhaling the obnoxious fumes from a Revell model, dope was for my model airplane wings. Boy, was that stuff atrocious. My dad and I used to build those darn gillows planes. Talk about time consuming. Kids would not have the attention to build those today.

Why not a new energy source from solvents. They are everywhere, under the kitchen sink, in the bathroom, and in the closet. You know, WINDEX.

Of course there are many obnoxious chemicals that could be used for new energy sources. Like that green stuff growing in the basement laundry room. No, that's not green...its gray. No, its blue. I don't remember, but its yucky and stinks.

Did Richard Nixon ban that new energy bill in 1971? I don't remember, but I do remember tricky dicky in 1973. He banned everything, including new carpet gas. I don't know if he banned flying carpets or not, but I do know that carpet gas was like swamp gas. Swamp gas is fun. You ever seen a swamp rat killed by swamp gas? Swamp gas, what is that? rotting vegetation? what kind? peatmoss. You ever wondered about that term "sphaghum"? Now that's a neat term. I heard that at one time during the industrial revolutions, that people burned peatmoss instead of coal. How old is peatmoss? Is it real old, or just yesterday's garbage. I mean is it moss? Does peatmoss deliver swamp gas? What? Swampin', "swampin"

Do you remember about ten or more years ago on ESPN or some sports channel the sport of swamp-buggy racing was big. What's with that? Racing around a track filled with water, with wheels bigger than the vehicle. Where did those famous swamp-buggy race-car drivers go? You don't see those everyday like NASCAR. Maybe they still show it on the SPEED channel. All I can say is give a man an engine and he will learn to attach it to anything. There probably is someone who has a motorized log, just to see if it could be done. I'll bet someone has attached an engine to a live bird, just to watch it fly faster. And I like birds.



Woo Hoo! Why are the UVA Cavaliers called the Wahoos? I'll bet there is some swamp gas around Charlottesville, maybe that is the reason for a wahoo. When Thomas Jefferson built Monticello, he observed the effects of swamp gas in his backyard. Lewis and Clark were going to take swamp gas with them to the Pacific, but were detained by local medicine men. Thomas Jefferson would have been an interesting drinking buddy.

As I was looking into the sky last night while smoking my cigar, I stared at Orion. His belt was almost vertical from my perspective, even though I live in a virtual "vortex house". Maybe from this latitude Orion's belt is always vertical. At the equator from Brazil it is probably horizontal. Its hard to comprehend this based on sidereal time. As I look up into the night sky, I visualize Latitude and Longitude, but my north is not centered. I often wonder about precession. Why is the North Star considered North? And what about that Earth/Moon wobble which changes constantly based on the Lunar month. 29 days....almost.

Twenty-nine. I remember that year. Stock market crash, lots of money made and a fine automobile. Oh, and the cotton. Cotton everywhere. One could find a nice cotton shirt by picking the lint off the ground. My grandmother said it was not fun. Picking cotton, that is. She remembered everything before the war. So did Dad. Everything that has to do with playing tiddly-winks. You know, the round disks that were a sure-fire competition for marbles. Why was that interesting? Marbles? They're round, spherical, made of glass...so what. Oh yea, you could shoot them. With a BB gun. And they would break.

Speaking of BB's...why are they copper? or brass? And what's with the term, "brass tacks"? What's with brass? bronze? tin? pewter? Where did pewter go? My grandmother had pewter everything? She also had tin? Why are items that we buy made with plastic, when many years ago we had bakelite & phenolic. Not that they were attractive, but plastic is so....well, plastic. It looks so plastic and cheap. I like metals. They are wonderful, they melt and can be shaped into anything. Gold, now there's a metal. But then again, Silver is right pretty. I like silver...not sterling, but solid silver. Silver ingots are beautiful & heavy. Mine are shiny and fun to look at too. Yep...silver and gold...silver and gold...am I bugging you...I don't mean to bug ya! Now that's a thought.

ahhhhhhh! It's about time to refresh my memory. --press button-- Ok, now I'm ready...but ready for what? Maybe a few questions:

Have you ever looked outside at night and wondered where the stars went? Oh, its cloudy.

Have you ever decided that now is not the time? Huh.

Did you ever wonder why we wonder?

Can humans really spontaneously combust? I saw a cat do this once, it was interesting...no that wasn't a cat.

Was there ever a better language than what we presently use? Why not Latin? What happened to it? Why are lawyers the only ones who can use it?

My son is using a time machine for the Cretaceous Period, is this normal? He comes back to the present quite disturbed.

What ever happened to Fidel Castro? Is he 139 years old?

I like TV, why doesn't it like me?

Why do people have 5 senses? And why are they so close together? I think within inches of each other.

Who is "zeitgeist"?

When do we get paid for creating these blogging sites? How much do we get paid? Does the check come in the mail? Is the pay good...I mean in comparison? Who's the boss? Is he/she a good manager? Do we have annual reviews? I don't like those...its so subjective.

Ever wonder why Christmas is celebrated on December 25? Why is New Year's on January 1? Why not February 1? Who came up with that, Pope Gregory? And Easter...what's with that date. Why is it always on April 1? I mean that is really dumb. Not that I don't like Easter, but I would like to practice my Christianity in one week. Christmas & Easter should be consecutive days.

Why do computers use potato-chips?

When one reads in the paper that scientists have found another planet in our solar system, why do so many people reject the "more than 9 planet" theory? Are the new planets too far away? Is pluto the outer region boundary of our solar system backyard? Can we put up a privacy fence?

A friend of mine told me yesterday that, "only salesmen use first names in conversation." I think he's right, I haven't heard my name in years from my friends. Think about it...and I like my name.

Do dust mites eat those dried boogers under my chair? Where do they go?

Now that the internet has created virtual campuses and colleges, can we create our own degree? How about our own college? I've always wanted more education.

Now education with all that "left behind" stuff. Does Hal Lindsey care? Is it true that no child will be left behind when the bus comes to get them in the morning before school? That's incredible. The United States is the greatest country on the North American Continent. Personally, I take the short bus. You know, the one that's not really a bus, but looks like a cross between a Winnebago and an El Camino. Now, when I was in elementary school, the buses were yellow. Today they are orange. I don't understand, maybe the Education Czar or Secretary (Administrative Assistant) of State is colorblind. They were yellow when I was a youngster. And what's with those removal contraptions on the front of school buses. Now, I would be really mad if the bus driver used that thing to get me out of the way. Those bus drivers need to use some anger management, and not take their frustrations out on elementary school kids. NCLB, I like the sound of that. Now if the government could only change the color of the school buses back to yellow, then we would be in business.

Business...hah, I scoff in the face of danger. My business, your business, its all a bunch of hooey. Why, the economy has always been built to railroad those unfortunate hoodlums who stand on the tracks.
Sometimes the economy gets derailed by them. That drives interest rates way up. Unemployment rates go through the roof. It's good to have a roof over your head in times like these.

...Later that day

And speaking of combustion, I think there should be a new alternative energy based on spontaneous combustion (see above). The only problem is that your energy sources would come from other people. And you never know when you could use this sort of energy, that's why is called "spontaneous". Maybe cats would be useful for this new alternative energy (only those that spontaneously combust). It would be like Schrodinger's cat, because in Quantum Physics you do not know when or where they will combust. It's a thought anyway. I've read lots of Alternate Energy sites on the Internet.

I'm afraid of becoming my own alternative energy...poof.

just kidding, my son is afraid that I will spontaneously combust at random...statistically speaking. I've seen all the new sources of energy on the internet and it is totally amazing. Flux drive induction, parallel loop enhancers, magnetic resonance, earth waves. Boy is our world wonderful. I can't wait till that happens, I'll be able to drive my car on brain waves alone. Awesome.

Have you heard of this new Ipod thing? Its a portal or something that transports a person to another place. I've seen it happen. I saw a kid the other day who placed these probes in his ear that were emanating from his Ipod and poof....he transported to U2 (Uranus, 2nd planet). I've got to get one of those, sounds great. I can now transport myself to the back room in my house. It's awesome, I can get my TV remote without leaving the room. It's better than TIVO. And the world thought TIVO would be transforming. I'll bet one day, everyone will have Ipods. I hear that they hold several giga-watts too! And store more information than the Library of Congress.

And speaking of Congress. I want to visit Washington DC. It sounds like a great place with all those statues & stuff. And the world's greatest library. One day, I won't have to go, because I'll have an Ipod. Bill Gates must be proud, since he invented the Apple Computer. He also invented the software to go with the dang thang. What a great operating system too! Windows is awesome. I like windows. You can see out of them...they are clear...and they only require Windex to clean. And they keep the cold out too! It's a great invention. I heard that they are made from sand, like Silicon or something. So computers and sand have much in common. One is a thinking machine and the other is well....sand.

Did you ever wonder why we let computers take all the jobs? I applied for a job many years back, and waited awhile for a phone call from the company. Sure enough, they hired a Packard-Bell. No, it was a VIC 20...or Commodore 64. I don't remember, but boy was I mad. I needed that job. Now, I've got a great job at Home Depot. I stand in the corner of the store and wait for people to scan their items through the check-out machine. I get to manage the check-out computer. The computer makes me angry sometimes, but I straighten it out with some TQM, staff meetings, team meetings, ISO 9000 standards, you name it. Whenever I get frustrated at work, I slap that computer back into shape with a Stanley hammer and a Black and Decker drill. Its a great 9 to 9 / 7 day position. I've only got about 17 more years to retire, but I'm getting prepared with my 401K, 401Q, 401R and 403AB accounts. And the stocks...don't even start.

What is the 401K for? Does anyone have one of these? They take this portion of my paycheck and apply it to one of these 401K things and the next thing I know, I'm taking care of business. Its got this economic sanctioning ability, or you can feed the homeless. I like it. It's a great plan.

Do you remember the FDR plan? Roosevelt's Great Society? Awesome.
I can only remember Nixon unfortunately. My parents remembered Roosevelt though. He fought in the war or something, and then became president of the United States. Isn't that something? My parents said he had a plan for everything...there was the Marshall Plan, but I don't know where he got that name, the Tennessee Valley Authority initiated in Florida (that's one long river), and WPA. I don't know what the WPA was for, but it was great. The government built all kinds of databases, networking and internet networking between states. It wasn't HTML though, it was based on Morse code or something. Samuel Morse was a genius. And an American. He also invented Bundt Cake. Wow!

I love that Patsy Cline song, "Crazy...crazy for feeling so lonely...I'm crazy, crazy for feelin' so blue" Now that's country music. I heard some guy singing that song to himself with those probes in his ear from his Ipod and afterward he transported himself to Winchester, Virginia. I've got to get one of those things.

Where does country music end geographically? To the West, maybe Nevada. To the North, maybe Northwest Territory. To the East, Bermuda. To the South...well, hell's bells that's where its heading...Mexico & San Salvador. Yep, I listen to country/rap/latin/reggae music. Its the new wave of listening on satellite radio. I'm sirius. Country music is the real thing. Yodelling and lyrics. I like it. And you can sing to it too!